Hetalia Episode 12

The scene opens up in France’s house. France somberly asks England if he will marry him, and England makes a strange blank face.

[Opening Sequence]

The camera slowly zooms out as England continues making his nervous-yet-blank face. He seems to be in shock about the whole thing and stutters that it isn’t April Fools’ Day. France does not answer him, looking even gloomier than he already was. England tries to break the tension as he stands up and weakly mocks France, asking him if he was too dumb to buy a calendar. France says softly that he did buy a calendar, causing England to stagger back, wondering what is up with France’s strange reaction.

France then slides a document across the table with a fountain pen. (Since it’s a Japanese show, the document is in Japanese. But it’s kind of funny that France would have the Japanese form.) England yells that the form is for marriage registration and calls France an idiot as France attempts to make England sign the paper. France—with intense blank eyes and blue lines down his face—eerily insists that the paper is a calendar (what), as the camera wobbles, going in and out of focus. England gains the same blue lines on his face as he looks on in horror.

France grips England’s hand tightly, continuing in vain to try to convince England that it is a calendar. England remarks that he is really scary today and demands that France let him go, but the other refuses. France forces England’s hand to the document and starts to make him write his name at the top.

England demands to know what is going on, and France yells in desperation that he has no other choice and that it is not like he wants to get married to England. He draws back momentarily and explains tearfully and dramatically that his house is in a bind after the Suez Canal deal^[1] and that his superior said that if France did not merge with England, then France might die. A small carefree cartoonish head (supposedly France’s superior, Guy Mollet?) appears on screen with France, cheerfully saying “you might die~!”

England jabs France in the gut with his elbow and forces himself back up. He angrily tells France that he does not want to marry him for that reason and then scribbles out his name at the top. France cries out in horror, while England laughs smugly, saying it serves him right for trying to force him to sign the marriage registration form. France cries loudly, calling England a heartless fiend and a demon that doesn’t care if he dies. He grabs England by the lapels and pleads with him once more to marry him, saying that he doesn’t even care if England decides to rename him “British-occupied France” if they married, and that England could think of it as a big favor.

England calls him an idiot again as he coldly turns away in irritation. Just because France is in a jam doesn’t mean he is obligated to help him out. He tells France to solve his own problems, when France comes up behind him and detains him, a creepy smile widening on his face. He then starts scuttling backwards, comically dragging a protesting England with him as he does.

The screen goes to black and there is the sound of a typewriter, as the following text fills the screen:

Franco-British Union

In 1956, amidst the rising tensions of the Suez Crisis, Guy Mollet^[2], then the current French Prime Minister, proposed an English-French Union to England with the words, “Even making Queen Elizabeth the joint sovereign is fine.”

Even after being shot down by the English, he still said, “We would like to join the Commonwealth of Nations”

Well, thinking about it normally, it’s impossible. Doing that…

France appears again on top of the text (with French music playing), muttering to himself that everything will work and turn out alright. He starts laughing breathlessly, as he tries to convince himself that his words are true.

[1] The Suez Crisis (aka the Tripartite Aggression) was a military attack by Britain, France, and Israel in 1956 in an attempt to take control of the Suez Canal in Egypt. The Suez Crisis was an important event for marking the end of imperialism. The attack followed Egypt's decision to nationalize the Suez Canal, after the withdrawal of an offer by Britain and the United States to fund the building of the Aswan Dam. Egyptian President Gamal Abdel Nasser nationalized the canal in 1956 and transferred it to the Suez Canal Authority, intending to finance the dam project using revenue from the canal. This provoked the Suez Crisis, in which the UK, France and Israel planned to invade Egypt to take control of the canal. To stop the war from spreading, Canadian Secretary of State for External Affairs, Lester B. Pearson, proposed the creation of the very first United Nations peacekeeping force to ensure access to the canal for all and an Israeli withdrawal from the Sinai. On 4 November 1956, a majority of nations at the United Nations voted for Pearson's peacekeeping resolution, which mandated the UN peacekeepers to stay in the Sinai Peninsula unless both Egypt and Israel agreed to their withdrawal. The United States backed this proposal by putting pressure on the British government by selling Pounds, which would cause it to depreciate. Britain then agreed to withdraw its troops. After Suez, Cyprus, Aden, and Iraq became the main bases for the British in the region, while the French concentrated their forces at Bizerte and Beirut.

[2] French Prime Minister from 1956-1957. Mollet approached the British Government in 1956, suggesting the idea of a Franco-British Union — an economic and political union between France and the United Kingdom. Mollet's request for Union with Britain was rejected, but the additional possibility of France joining the Commonwealth of Nations was considered, although ultimately similarly rejected.